Happy new year to all! Even though i'm 5days late(:
i didnt end and start my new year very nicely, less said about those whom i have affected as well. I do think i was at fault, but the truth is that it was never my intention to hurt. Really. Just, well, i wasnt careful with my thought processes and choices of language i suppose.
in any case, i wasnt at all thrilled about my new posting too. Coy2IC does sound like a powerful and demanding role. And it is, just that i am absolved of many duties and responsibilities and of cos, of decisions i have to make. Maybe because im new and my oc doesnt want to 'bully' me with the new stuff? But it is so different from what i expected and i just don't know how to make myself useful. Other than accepting requests by my sergeants to be the MC for CNY celebration, performing a song, turn up for fmn dnd, etc.
as much as i hate saying this, but the new year has taught me that i am not as good as i think i am. Meaning to say, i've seen so much flaws in myself. So many things i hate about myself, but it's just so weird to say 'i hate myself' when i should be loving myself, right? 'who doesn't have flaws?' is a comforting thought, but who doesn't want to be flawless?
and therefore, besides those tangible and physical achievements, i have 2resolutions for the year 2009. 1) to be a better friend and, 2) to be a better commander.
oh, and i think only few can judge if i have fulfilled 1), but none can judge if i have fulfilled 2). I do hope my drivers and storemen will like me and listen to me! Hah.
i didnt end and start my new year very nicely, less said about those whom i have affected as well. I do think i was at fault, but the truth is that it was never my intention to hurt. Really. Just, well, i wasnt careful with my thought processes and choices of language i suppose.
in any case, i wasnt at all thrilled about my new posting too. Coy2IC does sound like a powerful and demanding role. And it is, just that i am absolved of many duties and responsibilities and of cos, of decisions i have to make. Maybe because im new and my oc doesnt want to 'bully' me with the new stuff? But it is so different from what i expected and i just don't know how to make myself useful. Other than accepting requests by my sergeants to be the MC for CNY celebration, performing a song, turn up for fmn dnd, etc.
as much as i hate saying this, but the new year has taught me that i am not as good as i think i am. Meaning to say, i've seen so much flaws in myself. So many things i hate about myself, but it's just so weird to say 'i hate myself' when i should be loving myself, right? 'who doesn't have flaws?' is a comforting thought, but who doesn't want to be flawless?
and therefore, besides those tangible and physical achievements, i have 2resolutions for the year 2009. 1) to be a better friend and, 2) to be a better commander.
oh, and i think only few can judge if i have fulfilled 1), but none can judge if i have fulfilled 2). I do hope my drivers and storemen will like me and listen to me! Hah.
posted by Jiahao4 | 12:34 PM
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